Relationships

You now have your mom confidence rocking so you are comfortable with yourself and you know what you will/not tolerate. You are trying to go places to meet new people etc.. However, being in relationships can be difficult.

Being in relationships is a lot of work and compromise. Sometimes you find yourself being the only one whom is doing the compromise and when this happens you may want to fall back and evaluate the relationship.

Like I stated before I was a single mom for 13 years and through out those years I was engaged once and had some other decent relationships during those times. Honestly, I can say that with each relationship I learned more about myself, what I would/not tolerate, whether or not my needs were being met, etc.. I am telling you there is no need in focusing on why each relationship failed as the focus has to be on the lessons learned from each of them.

Focusing on the lessons allows you the opportunity to grow and in hindsight is preparation for what is to come. Now when we focus on the why, we then go back down that spiraling staircase of negativity and pointing all the blame on ourselves and what we could have done different. When in all honesty it takes two people to make a relationship work, all the work can not be on us if it is going to mature into something worth while.

In the midst of all this dating you have friends and family getting married, having more babies, etc.. I am telling you I really could be the girl in the move “27 Dresses” because I have been a bridesmaids so many times I could open a store…lol. The only difference was I was in no way in a rush to be married because my mindset was I am only getting married once. So there was no need in being pressured by the “when are you getting married”, or the “after while you are going to be too old”, and “when are you going to have another baby” comments. When you are in a relationship it is ok to take your time, really get to the know the person but most importantly get to know who you are. Because we woman have the tendency to conform to what others want us to be.

Do not allow yourself to fall in the trap of conformity. We also, get caught up in building our careers and trying to climb the corporate latter. Because we as woman have to work twice as hard as a man for less pay so we always feel like we have to prove ourselves. When the only person we truly have to prove ourselves to is us. We have to stop letting others get in our head and we have to get our of our own heads and find balance. Find what truly works for us.

WORDS OF INSPIRATION:

There are tons of relationship traps that we fall into and those relationships take a lot of work. However, the most important relationship is the one that you have with yourself. You have to know what makes you happy and you have to truly love yourself before you can accept love from anyone else.

Walk with the wise and become wise, for a companion of fools suffers harm. -(Proverbs 13:20)

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